not fixed (never fixed) but unmistakingly better
by michellejjones
Summary: "She knows that he would have left even if she'd been older; Steven has just as much baggage as she does, and he'd never had the chance to find himself like she had (though look what she'd found; an insane woman lying inside of her). She doesn't hate him. After all, he didn't know he'd break her." [Oneshot. Hoennchampionshipping. Steven/May. Talks of mental illnesses. Gameverse.]


**The fanfic is separated by two timelines: _[_ _Before],_ and _[_ _After]._ Each will be stated at the top of each break in the story, e.g., _[_ _Before]_ will be at the top of the next part of the story if it's before Steven left for Sinnoh, and _[After]_ will be at the top of the next part of the story if it is after Steven leaves for Sinnoh. The first part of this fanfiction is unmarked, because it is the sort of set up for the fanfiction. That is all. Enjoy.**

* * *

 **not fixed (never fixed) but unmistakingly better.**

 **by clarabella wandering.**

* * *

 _Dear May:_

 _I have something in mind,  
so I will be away training for quite some time._  
 _I do not expect to return home anytime soon,_  
 _which brings me to a request:_  
 _I want you to take the pokeball that you should find on my desk._  
 _The Beldum inside is one of my favorite pokemon,_  
 _so I hope you'll treat it like on of your own._

 _Trusting we will meet again,_  
 ** _Steven Stone._**

She struggles to breath, her hands clutching the ends of the table, a pain in her abdomen that she's never before felt before, not ever. It's a cold, empty feeling that spreads to her toes, to her head, to her _heart._ She picks up her cellphone, the cellphone he gave her, and frantically presses the number _2,_ holding the phone up to her ear.

"Please," she murmurs, "please, pick up. Pick up, Steven. Pick up."

 _"Hello,"_ she hears his voice, and she leans heavily against the wall, relieved.

"Stev-"

 _"You have reached the personal cellphone of Steven Stone. If you have this, it means you are someone important to me in my personal life. Sorry I can't get to the phone right now, but if you leave a message, I'll get back as soon as possible. Goodbye."_ The phone beeps, signaling she's to leave a message.

She sets it down slowly, before she releases the Beldum trapped inside the Pokeball. "Oh, Beldum," she says, her arms wrapping around the baby, "Why did he leave us?" She cries, and the baby Pokemon, though not understanding, cries with her new Trainer.

It isn't until the phone finally beeps, signaling the end of the call, that May realizes she's accidentally left the first man she's ever loved a voicemail of what it sounded like when her heart broke because of him.

* * *

 ** _[Before.]_**

The Pokemon Center in Rustboro is homey, May thinks, as she sets Torchic and Skitty down, watches them play until they tire each other out, and then beg to be put in her lap. She lefts them, one by one, and lets them settle themselves; Skitty lies down on May's lap, Torchic finds a perch on the side of May's chair, and burrows into its partner's side. They sleep there, and she skims through her textbooks on Pokemon Evolution, currently reading the chapter on Pokemon who must use stones to evolve.

 _A Pichu,_ May reads, _Will evolve into a Pikachu with lack of Stone, but a Pikachu will stay a Pikachu until exposed to a Thunder Stone. If exposed, this will result in an evolution into a Raichu._ She continues reading, about the Monkey trio in unova who evolve when exposed to three different stones, about Pokemon she's never seen (vows to see). The Roselia column interests her, especially: She's always wanted one.

It isn't until a man leans over her shoulder, interested in the Shiny Stone depicted on the right page. She reels back, eyes wide, and says, "Um, can I help you?" It comes off sassier than she intended it to, and she is quick to backtrack. "I'm sorry," May shakes her head, "I just, you scared me. What's your name?"

The man -a silver haired stranger with warm blue eyes and the face of an angel- smiles, "It's no problem, miss. I just have an interest in stones, you see, and you happen to be studying them, from the looks of it."

"Pokemon who evolve using stones, specifically," May corrects lightly. She continues to study his face: It truly is handsome. "What was your name?"

He doesn't answer, only accepts the six Pokeballs Nurse Joy hands him. When he turns back to her, he says, "I hope you learn all you want to learn about Pokemon-stone relationships. They truly are magnificent." He nods to her, an award-winning smile easing itself onto his face. "I think we will meet again."

He's gone just like that, and it isn't until she glances at the Shiny Stone again that May realizes her handsome stranger never revealed his name to her.

* * *

 _ **[After.]**_

"Come now," Wallace chirps, feeding the Beldum and May's other Pokemon as the girl herself lies, face first, on his couch. "Eat up. You need to grow up big and strong, after all." The Beldum cautiously -shyly- approaches her bowl, takes a single bite, and then follow up with another. Delcatty, Roselia, Blaziken, and May's many - _many-_ other Pokemon are quick to follow. Outside, he can see May's Milotic enjoying the large pool with his own Milotic, their Water-type Pokemon lounging around here and there.

Once the task of feeding the Pokemon is done, Wallace turns to the eighteen-year-old girl before him. He clicks his tongue, a sad look dancing across his features.

The girl is miserable.

"May," He pokes her, "Get up. Brendan will be here soon. He's taking you dancing, remember?"

Slowly, May rises until she's propped up on her elbows. "Wallace?"

He looks at her hopefully, "Yes?"

She throws a pillow at him. "Shut the f"-outside, her Gyarados roars- "up."

Wallace narrows his eyes, "I am your _friend._ So is Brendan. You are the _Champion._ You can't just sit here forever. You've duties to attend to."

"Well," May says, "I'm gonna retire."

"No, you're not."

She sighs.

"No," she agrees. "I'm not."

* * *

 _ **[After.]**_

Brendan loves her.

May knows this.

She's never been the dense type; Maybe she looks it, acts it, at times, but she's quite perceptive. Her melingerism is an art she's mastered throughout her teen years, an art that has gotten her places -some good, and some bad.

Looking at Brendan, now, she knows that she cannot stop pretending she doesn't know.

Her back is pressed against the wall. Wallace is far off, on the dance floor, an arm wrapped around his sister, Lisia, as she and he chat animatedly with Winnona and Roxanne. Wally is waving to her from far away. He and Brendan approach her slowly. She straightens. "Wallflower, much?" Wally asks, by way of greeting.

May rolls her eyes, pushing the bitterness in her gut down until it's barely noticeable. "Hello to you too." Her eyes move to Brendan's. She smiles softly.

Brendan, his blush evident even in the darkness, says, cautiously, "Would you like to dance?"

She freezes up, looks wildly around the room for an escape (because she wants to confront him, but not with Wally as a witness; Not like this). Wallace glances at her with alarm, but he's too far away to be of any help. She eyes Phoebe, who begins to approach quickly, but help comes before she can sweep in.

"Now, wait a minute," Wally says, looking at May with an unreadable expression before glancing at Brendan, teasing, "You're her _best friend._ You can dance with her whenever you want." He holds a hand out to her. Phoebe stops moving. Wally gives May a knowing look, "I can't." With a flourish, he bows, "So, Madam Champion... _May_ I have this dance?"

In spite of herself, May laughs, lets him take her out to the dance floor, casting Brendan a shrug. "That was the _worst_ pun I've ever heard." When they are out of earshot, she murmurs, "Thank you, Wally."

He smiles, "I am forever in your debt, y'know. Just thought I'd start to repay it." She looks up, wondering when he got taller than her. She rests her arm on his, and they begin an easy waltz.

"What happened," May begins slowly, "To the little boy I helped, the little boy who caught a Ralts, only a year ago?"

Wally doesn't answer until after he spins her around. "He grew up." Wally informs, almost darkly.

When May looks at him, she feels the bitterness in her belly rising, swelling in her chest, the heartbreak making her sick. In that moment, his green hair, illuminated by the lights, looks silver. His blue eyes bore into hers with the same look that _he_ always gave her. May tears her hand away. "I'm sorry," May says, apologetically. "I can't. You look-" She chokes on her words, "You look just like... just like..."

She doesn't have to finish.

 _("You look just like Steven.")_

May walks meekly to the other side of the room, pours herself a glass of champagne that will take the edge away, and swallows it in one gulp.

This way, when the memories come, it isn't so bad.

* * *

 _ **[Before.]**_

"You've never heard of the story of the Gurdurr who held up the sky?" Steven asks her as he tilts his head, sipping the wine from his glass. She, in turn, fiddles with her skirt before shaking her head. There's a short silence, until May hears a song that sparks a smirk to slide onto her face.

"Hey, Steven," May chirps, her confidence returning, "Come dance with me."

He looks confused, "Why?"

"Because," she rolls her eyes, hauling him onto the floor despite his protests, "The song is called _Hey Stephen._ Just because your name's spelled differently than in the title doesn't mean you can't dance to it. This song is, like, your staple."

Steven looks amused -indeed, May is amusing- but doesn't hesitate to pull her close to him and dance to the simple beat. "This song," he says after a long moment, "is about a girl fawning over a boy called _Stephen."_

May nods. "So?"

He doesn't respond, just gently lifts her head so that they are making direct eye contact. His eyes are the same warm blue that they were since the first time she met him, at the Pokemon Center in Rustboro. His hair looks like moonlight. He is smiling warmly at her. "I didn't know you felt that way," he jokes, weakly.

They just look look at each other, until the song ends, and another one -this one a slow dance- starts. SHe moves to pull away, but he pulls her back. "Dance with me," He asks, mimicking her earlier request.

And she does.

* * *

 _ **[After.]**_

"Arceus," Wallace says roughly, as he watches May throw up in his toilet. "Some roommate I've got."

Lisia glares at him from where she's holding back May's hair. _Shut. Up._ She mouths. Wallace blinks, knowing his mistake. "I'm sorry," He says, once May is done. They usher her back into her bedroom and lay her down. Metang quietly peeks her head in. When May sees her, she tells her to come in. Delcatty, Blaziken, and her other Pokemon follow suit.

"Thank you both," May says, when she's situated. "I'm really sorry. I haven't had an episode like that in months... I just..." She sighs, "I don't know what came over me."

Wallace's face softens. "Thanks, sis," he says to Lisia. She nods, before smiling at May, hugging her brother, and then leaving the room. When they are alone, Wallace faces May. "I don't expect you to be over this in six months, May. You do, and you need to stop. It isn't healthy for you."

May doesn't say anything. Wallace continues, "One day, he'll be ready for you to come after him. Will you?"

He leaves the question for her to answer privately. Standing, Wallace walks out of the room.

May's baby Pichu crawls into her lap. "Hello," she murmurs.

Her team settles themselves in the bedroom. Some go to sleep. Others chatter amongst themselves.

May doesn't do either.

* * *

 _ **[Before.]**_

He can feel himself falling for her, has felt the pull ever since he met her at that Pokemon Center, ever since he realized she was probably the only person who didn't know who he was.

And he can feel himself loathing himself for it. She's seventeen when he meets her; He, of course, doesn't know this, but it makes no difference once he finds out. He tells himself that these feelings will go away, that the hold she has over him is of no significance.

He's wrong.

* * *

 _ **[After.]**_

 _"Three new voicemails."_

A typing of his password.

 _"First new message from: Lisia Reyes."_ Her voice cuts through the computerized voice, angry and emotional, _"Steven Stone, you SOB. How could you do this to not just us, but_ her? _Arceus, she's eighteen, why would you do this to her? To yourself? Why would you leave all of us like this? I mean, a letter, Steven. A letter? Just... Mew, just come home. Come home."_

His eyes close. A press of a button.

 _"Message deleted. Next message from: Wallace Reyes."_ Steven holds his breath, preparing for an explosion, but instead, he is met with an even voice. _"You're my best friend. I always thought you were smart. I guess I was wrong, because I never, ever, thought you were capable of doing something so_ stupid. _I read the letter. 'I have something in mind', really, Steven? What are you training against? Your feelings? Arceus, you're breaking her. Not just her heart, but her entire being. She's a mess, and I can't imagine you're much better. Get back here before she's unfixable."_

Steven's hands are shaking, but he manages to delete Wallace's message.

 _"Message deleted. Next message from: May Riggan."_

Slowly, Steven opens his eyes, staring at the phone as May's voice cuts through. She's sobbing. _"Oh, Beldum,"_ he hears. Her voice is choked with emotion, _"Beldum, why did he leave us?"_

She asks the question three times before breaking down into sobs that wrench at his heart. Somewhere along the way, she begins to speak to herself. _"What did I do wrong? Why did he leave so soon after I became Champion? Was he mad he lost? Beldum, I don't know what to do..."_ He hears a hum, presumably from Beldum. _"Beldum, I am in love with him. I am in love with him and he left me. I was so stupid. I thought..."_ she quiets. _"I thought he loved me too. I'm afraid,"_ May's voice is hardly audible, but he catches the final fragments, _"I'm afraid that I'm going to break into an unfixable mess without my mentor. Without my friend."_

A pause.

 _"Without the first person I ever fell in lo-"_

The voicemail cuts off.

He stares at if for a long, long time, hands shaking, pieces shattered on the floor like puzzles he could never solve.

And far away, something breaks.

* * *

 _ **[Before.]**_

Latias is a beautiful, beautiful, _beautiful_ creature. Almost as beautiful, Steven thinks, as the woman who clutches his waist for her life, head leaning against his back.

She's his friend, by this point. And he hers. Riding Latias is just something that silently cements it, their connection. They both know that there is something more to them, but they've never addressed it. Just let it sit, let it simmer. When the trials of saving Latios are over, and he has persuaded May to let him join her party, she turns to him, eyes sparkling. "This place is beautiful."

He wants to say that it is almost as beautiful as her, but he bites his tongue. Instead he says, "You fought very well."

"Heh," May rubs her neck, "Thanks. You too. No wonder you're the Champion."

He tilts his head, "At the rate that you are moving through the ranks, I won't be for much longer."

The implication startles not just her, but him, too. Yet, when she offers him a timid smile, he thinks that maybe everything will be alright.

He is wrong.

* * *

 _ **[Before.]**_

"Are you," May takes a timid step forward, her Ralts watching closely. "Um, are you, by any chance Steven ... Stone?"

He turns. His eyes widen.

Hers widen even more.

"Stone girl!" He cries, voice echoing around the cave.

May doesn't say the nickname she has for him out loud. Instead, she scrunches her nose and says, "Your name is Steven _Stone?"_

"Yes," Steven says, "What's wrong with that?"

"Your name is Steven Stone..." May starts, "... and you collect _stones?"_

A beat.

And then, Steven laughs.

"Alright," He allows, "I suppose that is funny."

* * *

 _ **[After.]**_

It's been eight months when he checks his phone to see the eighteenth voicemail Wallace has left him.

 _"She finally broke."_ Steven sucks in a sharp breath, _"I took her to see a therapist for the first time. They put her on medication; She's got insomnia. And abandonment issues. Her mom is an alcoholic, you know. So there's addiction in her family history, too. Her insomnia got better when she left on her journey, went away completely when she met you."_

Steven swallows thickly.

 _"And then you left."_

Wallace breathes out, and Steven hears it in the voicemail. _"I'm not going to tell you the whole story, because you don't deserve to know it. We thought -I thought- you should know what you did to her. I'm not much better. You were my best friend. I know you loved her. Know you still do, probably. I don't know why you left, don't know what goes on in your mind, but I do know that May Riggan has become important to me; She's family, and you broke her. You broke her into pieces, and I don't think they can be put back together."_

Wallace sighs. _"This is the last time I'm calling you. Don't contact me ever. And if you do come to Hoenn, don't expect me to talk to you. You ran away, Steven. You ran away and you broke the strongest, brightest soul I've ever known. And that is unacceptable."_

The voicemail ends.

The phone drops.

It shatters.

(So does he.)

* * *

 _ **[After.]**_

"May?"

"In here!" She calls. Wallace peeks his head in. She's painting her nails. When she sees him, a giggle escapes her, and she sounds so _happy,_ so _healthy,_ that Wallace almost cries. "I like pink."

"As do I," Wallace agrees.

"What's up?"

"Brendan's here."

May's face closes. "Oh," she sighs, "what does he want?"

"He wants to take you dancing." Wallace replies.

May shakes her head, "I only dance with you and St-"

Just like that, the happiness fades from her system. Her eyes dim.

Wallace sighs.

* * *

 _ **[Before.]**_

She's giggling like there is no tomorrow as they sit at the top of the Lilycove Mall, watching the sun set, content. They sit side by side, shoulders touching. "May?" Steven asks, absentmindedly.

"Yeah?" May takes a bite of her ice cream.

"When's your birthday?"

She says, "June 13th." When he looks at her incredulously, she asks, "What?"

"May," Steven begins, "June 13th is _tomorrow."_

A scoff, "Liar."

"I am not!" Steven looks genuinely offended as he pulls out his PokeNav and shows her the date.

"Oh," May says, once the proof has been presented to her. "Huh. I guess I turn eighteen tomorrow, then."

Steven starts. "Eighteen?"

May nods, "I'm pretty old, right?"

He blinks, the sinking feeling in his heart making it difficult to breathe. "Well," he manages, "happy birthday."

She laughs, "Thanks!"

That's when things began to go wrong.

* * *

 _ **[After.]**_

Metagross is beautiful, May thinks as she polishes her Pokemon. Often, she'll get a bittersweet feeling when looking at her, but today, sheer happiness is the only thing that she feels. After all, Metagross (along with Blaziken, Roselia, Latios, Rayquaza, and Groudon) just helped her win another Hoenn League Championship battle.

The door is suddenly thrown open by a man in rags, his face covered by a mask. "Champion May Riggan!" He shouts.

May stands, slowly, alarmed. "Who are you? What do you want?" The man doesn't answer. Instead, he pulls out a gun and aims it at Metagross. "Arceus," May screams, "Blaziken, use Blaze Kick!"

But Blaziken only looks at her like she's gone mad. May turns to Roselia when it becomes evident that her partner will not attack, "Petal Dance, Roselia!" The Grass-type also looks at May like she's had too many beers. The man cocks the gun. May runs over to him and fights for it. She struggles, until she's knocked into a table and hits her head. There's a sickening _bang,_ and May cries, "METAGROSS!"

The last thing she sees is Metagross, alive, and no sign of the man that had attacked them.

The last _thought_ May has is that, not for the first time, she had been hallucinating.

* * *

 _ **[After.]**_

Her stitches itch every once in awhile, but she's okay, overall. When she and Wallace arrive home, the house is dark, all the Pokemon in bed. He leads her by the elbow into her bed, until his phone vibrates. "It's Winnona," Wallace informs.

May smiles weakly, "Go talk to your girlfriend."

He's halfway out the door when she mumbles, "Wallace?"

He hears her anyway. "What?"

"You're a really good friend."

Wallace swallows thickly.

"I try."

* * *

 _ **[Before.]**_

He leaves because he has heard that Team Aqua has moved onto Sinnoh, and he vows to stop them, to do something right.

Really, though, that's just an excuse.

The real reason he leaves is because the thought of not being with this young lady that he loved more than any stone, more than any Pokemon, more than any human, killed him. He was selfish, he couldn't do it, couldn't bear the thought of simply being her mentor. He left because he didn't know who he was, wanted to find himself, wanted to _see_ himself.

So he wandered away.

(Never did he think that she'd break in the process.)

* * *

 _ **[After.]**_

"A hallucination?" May asks Wallace at one in the morning. It's another night that she hadn't wanted to take her medicine, and he hadn't felt like forcing her, so he just sits with her, watching _The Suite Life of Jessie and James_ reruns.

Wallace glumly nods, "Yep. Your fourth one."

"Fourth?" May squints, "I don't remember having a fourth. I thought this was my third."

"Yeah, that's probably for the best." Wallace shifts, uncomfortable. "It wasn't a very good hallucination."

May leans into her seat, "Tell me." When he doesn't, she lays a hand on his arm, "Steven, I know I'm insane sometimes, but I'm okay right now. You can tell me."

She's right; Her eyes are clear. Taking a breath, Wallace says, "Someone knocked on the door one day. You went to answer it, and when it opened, you thought it was Steven."

May blinks.

"Oh," she says. "What did I do?"

"You cried."

"Why?"

Wallace doesn't look at her for a while. He says, "Because you killed him."

Her jaw drops. _"What?"_

He nods, "You killed him because you wanted him to feel what you felt." When May doesn't comment, he asks, "Is that how you feel? Dead?"

But instead of nodding, May shakes her head. "I have always been full of life. I guess, now, I'm even more full of it. So full, that I don't know what to do with it. I don't feel dead," she smiles softy, "I feel completely alive."

She stands, stretching. He thinks she's done talking, but her last sentence floors him.

"And, I think," May says, heading towards her room, "That's why everything hurts so much."

* * *

 ** _[After.]_**

She walks through the streets of Ever Grande, her head held high. In public, her insanity is often portrayed as aloofness, as the "good" type of crazy. She never goes into her fits while speaking to the media; These are quiet affairs. No, her random smiles and brash words have accidentally won the hearts of many.

And now, as she stands to face a group of crazies ("bad" crazy), protecting her region, she realizes that she has also accidentally seeded hate for herself in the hearts of just as many (maybe even more).

"Champion May Riggan," the head terrorist says, "It will be a pleasure to kill you."

May tils her head, "Sticks and stones won't break my bones, and words won't do much, either."

Someone behind Crazy #1 says, "That's the wrong phrase..."

"No," May corrects, "It's the perfect phrase for me." She pulls her Roselia out of her belt, enlarging the Pokeball, but before she can, there is a bang from behind her, and she falls to her knees.

Blood falls to the floor, pooling around her. She clutches her belly, surprise evident in her expression.

And then she faints.

* * *

 _ **[After.]**_

She fell in love with Steven, not because of his title, or because of his looks, but because of his personality, because of how he treated her.

Where the world saw a broken girl, he saw a woman with the potential to be great. If it weren't for him, she might have given up her journey, never bothering to challenge Wallace, or her father.

But she did, because of him.

She tells him she's barely eighteen almost unthinkingly, not realizing her mistake until his note is in her hands. She knows that he would have probably left even if she'd been older; Steven has just as much baggage as she does, after all, and he'd never had the chance to find himself like she'd been given (though look what she'd found; an insane woman lying inside of her).

She doesn't hate him -how can she? He left for her, to protect her.

He didn't know he'd break her.

* * *

 ** _[Before.]_**

"So, I just had an old lady call you a silver haired dream... boat..." May trails off, eyes widening upon seeing Steven, clad only in his underwear, walk out of his room. His eyes widen as well when he sees her.

"May!" He cries.

"Steven!" She appalls.

They run in opposite directions, May trying to forget the fact that he has _abs_ and very _strong arms,_ and Steven trying to get over the fact that an _eighteen year old_ has just seen more of him than anyone has since he was around _eight._ When he's finished changing, he walks out to face her, ready to talk about what's just happened, only to see that there are countless scientists outside the door of his house (where she had stopped by to visit him).

"Madam Champion," they say. Brendan and Wallace break through the crowd, "THERE IS AN ASTEROID," Brendan pants, "HURTLING to EARTH."

Wallace rolls his eyes, but then sees how unfazed May looks. "Doesn't that warrant at least a gasp, May?" He asks idly.

May shrugs, "Don't expect me to be impressed. I just saw Steven Stone in his underwear."

Steven puts his head in his hands and sighs.

* * *

 _ **[After.]**_

She awakens to a bandaged abdomen and bleary vision. Looking to her left, she finds Brendan, Wally, Lisia, and Wallace all sleeping in the corner. To her right are all her Pokemon -well, almost all of them. As many as can fit in the room. She listens to the silence, until she realizes that it isn't silence -someone is talking.

"The Gurdurr began to cry," the voice said, "it didn't want to hold up the sky! But, without any more complaint, it heaved a sigh and raised the sky, his shoulders shaking. It was heavy. The weight of the sky was heavier than the fattest Snorlax..."

She recognizes the voice as soon as she hears _Gurdurr._

It _is_ Steven Stone's favorite story, after all.

* * *

 ** _[After.]_**

"How are you even here?" Lisia asks him.

Steven says, "I pulled some strings."

"Well, unpull them, and get the f-" Wallace stops. "Get out." He finishes, "We don't want you here."

A noise behind them causes the three to turn. Brendan and Wally are looking at them, and May. "She's waking up," Wally says.

Brendan nods, clutching Wally like he is his anchor. "She'll be awake really soon."

As if on cue, May stirs. Her eyes pop open. Upon seeing Steven, May merely blinks and says, "Wallace?"

He straightens, "Yes, May?"

"Wallace," she says, never taking her eyes off Steven, "I'm hallucinating again."

He bites his lip. Gently, Wallace says, "no, May. You're not."

She gasps, before holding out a hand and commanding that Steven come closer. When he does so -albeit, very, _very_ hesitantly- she touches his hands before slapping him. When he staggers back, cheek becoming red from the impact, May nods.

"Hm," she hums, "I suppose I'm not."

* * *

 _ **[After.]**_

"Sit," May says, motioning for Steven to sit next to her. When he does, she asks, "How is your cheek?"

He looks startled, like a Deerling caught in headlights. May laughs loudly. "Do you know what I've been told, ever since I became Champion, since you left me, especially by Iris and Cynthia?"

Steven shakes his head, still silent.

"That I'm a lot like Alder." May tilts her head, "do you know why they say that?"

Another shake of his head.

"Alder was an alcoholic. He doesn't drink anymore, but that doesn't make him _not_ an alcoholic, as you probably know." May keeps her gaze on him steady, "he found his wife dead, murdered, after he came back from a meeting one day. He almost went mad, developed depression." She bites her cheek, "I am quite like him, I think. I believe we could have been great friends."

When Steven doesn't speak, she continues, "When I was six, my father walked out on my mother and I. Less than a month after that, my mother left, too. She dropped me off at my aunt's and left. I didn't see either parent until they came back, together, six years later, acting like a perfect married couple. They told me that we were moving to Hoenn, immediately." May pauses, "I guess it's no wonder I've got abandonment issues." She clears her throat, still looking at Steven intently, "my insomnia developed soon after my mother left me. You see, my aunt wasn't exactly..."

May doesn't have to finish her sentence. Steven already knows.

"My family has a history of addiction issues, so Wallace keeps all our pills and drinks under lock and key." She shakes her head, "I'm a mess, huh? Totally insane."

For the first time, Steven speaks, "I am, too."

Suddenly, May's gaze seems just a bit sharper. He realizes she's been waiting for him to say that. "I know that's why you left," May murmurs. "I know you left because you fell in love with me and thought I was too young. Because you didn't want to ruin my image, because you thought you were weak. I know you left because you didn't know who you were, and wanted to find yourself."

His jaw drops.

"Did you?"

He fumbles, "did I what?"

"Find yourself."

He takes a moment. Gathers his thoughts.

"No," Steven says. "I didn't. I am twenty-eight and I don't know who I am. I don't know much about myself."

She shrugs, "It's okay. I'm twenty-one and I think I know too much."

* * *

 _ **[After.]**_

They are not a perfect couple.

In fact, Steven and May don't even completely qualify as a couple; They hold hands, they kiss, they dance in the rain, but they are in a completely different realm. Their sanity is questionable. They ride away on Latios for long periods of time, only to randomly appear again, engagement rings shining on their fingers.

She tells him, late at night, before her Butterfree Sleeping Powder has kicked in, before he's finished writing about a never-before-seen stone, "Gospel for people like us, for fallen ones who assemble their philosophies from broken memories, is simple, don't you think?"

Steven raises a brow, "Whatever do you mean?"

"I mean that our thinking is simple, the thinking of us, of the vagabonds and imperfect imposters, is something that not everyone has mastered. Not the sane ones, at least." She yawns.

"And how do we think?"

She looks at him, "Without bounds, of course, because we know that we are totally bonkers. We know the best people are."

"The best people?"

She blinks, "The best people. You are insane, are you not?"

Steven feels a slow smile spread across his face, "you are just as insane as I am."

She scoffs.

* * *

 _ **[After.]**_

Wallace doesn't forgive him until he watches Steven cry over May as she screams at nothing. He doesn't forgive him until he watches Steven hold her in his arms with tenderness as she bites and scratches him, the love of her life.

He doesn't forgive Steven until the silver-haired man gets a dazed, far away look in his eyes and says, _"Mother? Why are you bleeding?"_ in the voice of a six-year-old.

It is then that Wallace watches the pieces of two broken people come together, fusing together until they are not fixed (never fixed), but unmistakably _better._

She's crazy, and he's a little bit unwell, Wallace thinks, as he watches them dance around their house with laughter bubbling from their lips, eyes bright with joy, but they are finally, _finally,_ happy.

And after he's watched them suffer for so long, Wallace can't help but think that they deserve it.

He listens to Lisia coo at them. Brendan and Wally make gagging noises. Winnona glances up at Wallace, trying to read him. Wallace smiles at her.

May sticks her tongue out at her new husband before kissing his nose. He grins before kissing her lips.

 _Yes,_ Wallace decides as he puts dinner on the table, _they, above everybody else, deserve it._

 **fin.**


End file.
